My Story

Welcome to my brand new, never done this before, blog! I hope my writings can bring back some special memories or help to make new ones. When I was about 13, I had the privilege of meeting a youth soccer team from Germany during a Youth World Cup Soccer tournament. We let two boys from Germany stay in our home for two weeks. I made a very special friend on that team and I know now that that meeting was meant to be. When the soccer team left I cried for days. I missed them all so much, especially one, who took my heart with him. He and I wrote to each other for a year, then he told me he had to go away for a while and wouldn't be writing any more. I never heard from him again. That was when I wrote my first song and it came busting out of my head like a freight train. After that heart breaking time, I began writing all the time. Sometimes the thoughts were so fast and furious, I couldn't keep up or couldn't always write them down. Sometimes it was a poem, sometimes a song, sometimes random thoughts or feelings, but for many years, it didn't stop. I was a typical kid in high school. I did have the greatest friends anyone could want and my family meant the world to me. My mom was one of my best friends (until the day she died). The second meeting that was meant to be, was a girl named Tama. We were both at our lockers and she was upset, so I reached out to her and that was that. We became like sisters. She played guitar and when I sang her my songs, we knew we had some work to do. We put music to my songs and sang together. We sounded so good together. A few years later, we recorded six or seven songs and went to California. A friend of my mom's got us in to see an agent, boy was I nervous! I had pretty bad stage fright, but as long as I was with Tama, I knew I could do it. We played our songs and he said he liked them, but we needed a band. He asked us to find a band and re-record the songs and bring them back to him. Unfortunately, Tama didn't feel these were positive words and decided to go back home. I stayed in California and worked on my voice, while I worked in the hotel business. I wanted so bad to try out for a musical at one of the many little theaters, but I never could muster up the courage to go audition. Well, life happened and I eventually moved back to Texas to be with family, because we found out my brother was dying. I gave up on my songs and I hadn't written anything new in a few years. I got pregnant, but it didn't work out with the dad. We lost my brother a year later. That was one of the hardest years of my life. I had my first child and lost my brother and my oldest brother lost his wife. Emotions were high and low and everywhere in between. I did write one poem for my son, before he was born, and one poem for my brother, when we lost him. However, it just seemed my writing sense had been silenced. I worked hard to support my son and me, with my parents help. I was back home with my family and friends, so life was good. My mom was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, and by a miracle, at the age of 67, went into remission. She was an amazing woman, in so many ways. I was blessed to have her as my mom. Well, I met a man and we eventually got married and I had a daughter (when my son was 13). Shortly after she was born, my friend Tama, was diagnosed with cancer. That year was next hardest years in my life. I had a new born baby, a very sick friend and my husband's mom was ill and passed away. In 2009, my friend lost her battle with cancer in January. My mom's cancer returned and we lost her a week before Christmas, the same year. I wrote and gave both their eulogies and couldn't make it all the way through either of them. The two most important women in my life, were gone. But, God had a plan, I just know it. I had a 2 year old, a son in high school and my dad to take care of. When my son left for college and I realized how much I was doing on my own. I struggled with how my life was going, but I stuck with it. A year ago, my struggle with being laid off and having to take a new job I didn't know and getting back to church really had me thinking, a lot. I saw a video on Facebook of Home Free singing Ring of Fire. I became completely taken with this amazing a capella group. I bought 2 albums, Home Free's Crazy Life and Tim Foust's (the bass singer for Home Free) The Best That I Could Do. I listened to Tim's CD first and when I heard the song "I've Seen", my life turned that corner, just as it had when I was 13. First, I cried for days. I cried out so much pain, loss and just pent up emotions. By the way, the song is happy, in the end, but it struck that chord in my heart and soul! This song reminded me of the songs I used to write and it had a bit of a personal meaning, as well. The proverbial "flood gates" opened. I began writing again, with a fury. I have been writing songs/lyrics, poems, stories and other ditties (for lack of a better term). And now, I feel the need to let my writings be seen and shared. My hope is to get the story I wrote for my daughter, published (it is actually a series of adventures). It's a long shot, but I am ready for the challenge this time!